I'm back

I'm finally back online at home at its great.
I have really missed it.

Well i'm busy with stuff for my course and i'm still enjoying it so i'm thinking about going on to do a degree in october. That is all being well.
At the end of last year i had a test to see if i need and extra suppot and it turns out that i do. So i will be getting lots of extra support. I have been saying for years that i'm dsylxic but have never been tested till now. It feels good to know i was right all along.
Back soon as i have lots of surfing to catch up on

Anyway

I'm still waiting for my broadband to be connected but luckerly i can use the internet at college for free.
Oh yeah i didn't say did i.
In september i started a course at uni. Its Access to Art, Design and Photography.
I'm really enjoying but with everything that has happened recently i have missed alsorts of things. But i can catch up so thats not to bad.
Yesterday we got given a project that looks really interesting and i've got to go and do some research. But its been raining and its really windy so that will have to wait a while before i go and do it.
I think i better get on with something so i'll be back soon
Fingers crossed i'll be back online at home really soon.

Hello

Just a quicky.
I'm without broadband at home at the moment and its driving me mad.
Fingers crossed i will be back online in the next week or so all being well.
Things aren't to bad at the moment.
I'll write more soon when i have the time to go into detail.
I will be back soon

Today

Well today went well and i didn't cry until i got home and read what some on line friends had writen. It was a lovely service and mother would have been pleased.

Here is the Eulogy that mothers best friend Lynn read

Well, you’ve all scrubbed up well! You do realise of course that Jan would be taking photos to scrapbook all this?

I’m doing this for 2 reasons. One because Jan knew that I’m a show-off who does a half hour turn if the fridge light goes on and secondly because I promised. I asked Jan to read ‘The Velveteen Rabbit’ at my wedding. It made her cry so much that in revenge she made me promise to read her eulogy.

Which she would write for me.

Which she forgot to do.

So she stitched me up!

Not as stitched up as Alan though, he inherited Jans mobile phone!

Jan was quite simply one of the nicest, wittiest and most intelligent people that I have ever met. I’ll give you an example of how intelligent she was. She could read Pension and Unison paperwork and understand it!

She also used her wit to deflate pompous situations. In the very politically correct mid-80s Jan was at Southampton University. One day a Feminist society put up a poster.

“ Will any students who have been sexually harassed and feel upset please send any relevant details to Femsoc etc”

Jan put up a poster underneath saying “ Will any students who have been sexually harassed and didn’t like it please send all relevant details to those of us who haven’t and would!”

Jan had an interesting life and one day at work, shortly after we had first met, she was telling me her life story whilst we were on the First floor tidying books. After a while we noticed that it had gone very quiet and we turned round to see all the students leaning back in their chairs….listening!

Jan loved parties and we had lots of them. Winter and Summer solstice parties, birthday fancy dress, in fact absolutely any excuse! Alan would always document the events with his great photos. She and I always used to worry about there being enough food, which led to the famous phrase…”Never knowingly under-catered”

I think John Lewis borrowed that and changed it a bit.

One of our last parties was the ‘Dead Royals’ party. I was having problems with my costume and Jan was having problems with her cooking.

I rang her up in a bit of a strop and shouted “ I’ve just thrown my costume on the floor and stamped on it!” “Good idea” she said “ I’ve just done the same thing with the hot water crust pastry!”

The gang of us also had some great weekends away. Mad times on the Isle of Wight, competitive pudding eating in the Cotswolds….all sorts of larks!

One winter we went to the St Nicholas Fayre in York. We had a great time shopping and Alan had a great time in the Railway Museum.

In the evening we went to Russells, an all you can eat Yorkshire carvery. So we ate all we could. Obviously.

We staggered back to the B&B( which Jan swore had moved further away!) We were halfway up the stairs to our rooms when I groaned and said that we would all probably explode and leave nothing behind but our boots and hats.

Jan said “Just boots and hats? If you and I explode Lynn, there’ll be bits all the way to Halifax!”

Even in her illness Jan was full of self-awareness & wit. After her diagnosis she was taken into hospital quite quickly to have the primary tumour removed. She was assigned not one, but TWO surgeons. Jan said they were putting on a Tag Team! But her brother Jim said “ Nope, ones going in and the other ones going to hold on to his ankles!”

Shortly before she died Jan said to me “ Well its not the end of the world if I die. Apart from affecting few people I wont leave much of a hole”

Jan, for once, you were very, very wrong.

Well, I must stop now but I really have enough material for a double DVD & extras!

I would just like to read this short poem that I found on T’Internet….

To laugh often and much.
To win the respect of intelligent people, and
the affection of children.

To earn the appreciation of honest critics.
To appreciate beauty.
To find the best in others.

To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child,
or a garden patch.

To know even one life has breathed easier because you
have lived.

This is to have succeeded.

Well

Tomorrows the day we lay mother to rest and I'm so glad that its happening before Christmas for the kids. It will mean that they can enjoy themselves without feeling guilty.
I talked to Dom about the funeral but i have no idea if hes taken it in or not. Its so hard to tell with him. But we'll see how he manages with it and take it from there.
Mothers best friend started a facebook group to remember her and we are looking for photos to add to the ones we already have. I may end up scrapping them at some stage (whenever that is). So if you have some please can you send them to me at bellatheboss@yahoo.co.uk
I am doing a memory box for Dom and in it i want people to write down good memories they have of mother so he can see how loved she was by other people and how she touched their lives as well as ours so if you want to be included just get in touch with me and I'll give you more details.

This time tomorrow we'll be on our way to the wake to remember her in a way she would have wanted.
I'm wearing clothes i have taken out of her wardrobe and Dom is wearing a new shirt i got for him the other day.
If you are not coming and want to be with us in spirit then could you wear something red as it's her favourite colour.

Going to get my hair cut first thing in the morning coz i now mother would have wanted me to and i haven't had it done for ages. Wish me luck that it turns out well.

I've got some more bits for Dom for Christmas and one of them is driving me mad. How do i wrap up a skateboard? I have no idea. Everything else is wrapped and in a good hiding place so i know i don't have to do that. All i have to do is put the tree up and do the food shopping.

Stuff

I can't believe that Christmas is so close. I'm glad that i started some of my shopping in November as starting now would be a nightmare. Last night i sat and wrapped up all the stocking fillers that i have got for Dom and i think i need to buy more to make up for what he won't have this year. Mother always went overboard with things for him as his dads family aren't interested. I just feel that i have to step up and do it. So I'll hit the shops again next week.
The best thing is that today a friend got hold of a Nintendo DS lite for me for Dom. I promised him one ages ago ad recently found out that everywhere was selling out really quickly. I was beginning to panic as i so wanted him to have it on Christmas day as he just can't go with out. Now with thanks to Wendy he won't have to. Wendy you're a star.

We have a date

The funeral will be taking place on
Monday 17th December 2007 3.30pm
Porchester Crematorium

Rest In peace mother

On Friday 7Th December 2007 at about 3.30pm mother finally lost her long fight against the dreaded Cancer. It was very peaceful in the end as she went in her sleep. We were all with her at the end.
It is a relief that its all over and there isn't anymore suffering.

We are now just waiting to arrange the funeral. No idea if that will before or after Christmas as this is a bad time of year.

A good friend Dolly (Karen) posted this lovely post on her blog which i think you should all read.

I'll post more when I'm thinking straight

Its been a while

I keep meaning to blog but things keep stopping me.
One of the major things that is happening here is that my mum is dying.
Three years ago she was diagnosed with Renal cancer and it had spread to her lungs. They removed the kidney and tumor which was huge. She was then OK up until recently. In July she got what we thought was Gout but later turned out to be bone cancer. In September after a CT scan we were told that the cancer had spread to her Bones, Liver and Breast. Since then she has really gone down hill.
She is now in a hospice and her kidney is failing so we have been told that we will lose her in the next week or so.
On Saturday we told Dom that she's dying and so far he has taken it really well. I am leaving it up to him as to whether or not he wants to see her and so far he does. So tomorrow he's having the day off school so we can go to see her (it's more important).
I'm sort out support for him so that there are people he can talk to and things we can do to remember her in a positive way. One thing we are going to do is a memory box as i think that will help him in the long term.

It's a dreadful time of year but we must get on with it

Well what can i say

Its been one of those weeks.
Last week i signed up for a Top Designer competition over at Bad Girls and each week if get through there is a class and you have to do project for it. Week 1 was colour theory and this is what i did.

This is a LO of My DS (Dominic) age 8 wearing with pride a handmade bead he got for his birthday called Dominoe
I think he looks so grown up that i wanted this to have a feel of sophistication and pride.
I hope that it comes across that way.

I chose these dream street papers because i felt that they matched the colour of my sons shirt and while still being boy they come across as more grown up.

I uploaded this last night and now i have to wait and see if i got through to week 2. I have at least 4 hours to wait so wish me luck.

Well it was fun and games here Wednesday. Dom came home early from school as he was ill (they never send a child home unless they think something is really wrong). About 7pm he starts complaining that all his joints ache, tummy ache, headache, feels really warm to the touch and then complains that the light hurts his eyes. So I 999 ambulance comes and he's taken into the children's assessment ward at the local hospital. When they take his temp it is 39.1 and is given paracetamol and by the time he is seen by a doctor is fine and back to normal.
We were there about 3 hours as he was admitted at 7.50 and we were home by midnight.
He has got some sort of infection but not sure what at the moment. He has two spots on his tonsils that could turn into something but who knows.

He's gone to school today and they haven't phoned me to go and get him so he should be OK. He'll be home in about an hour now so I'll see how he is then.
Looks like it was just a 24 hour thing.

I took these photos of him the other day when he was on the phone to his best mate Ben. He looks so cute. I just wonder what he will be like when he's a teenager as they were on the phone for about an hour then. He is watching TV at the same time as being on the phone and Ben was at the other end (it was the same programme).

Guest Designer

Today A TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE uploaded their Design Team Gallery and i'm in it. I'm one of the two guest designers for this month. This is what i did with what they sent me.



Please tell me what you think. I am not used to doing LO's any more. These are the
first ones i've done in ages.

Summer Holidays are over

Its true as Dom went back to school this morning. He is now in Year 4 with the same teacher Mr W Stallard. Its good for him to have a male teacher as he doesn't have many male role figures in his life. Anyway he went of happy so that makes me pleased.

Last week we had another day out and this time we stayed close to home. For a cheap day out we went to Charles Dickens Birthplace, The Natural History museum and Southsea Castle. We also went to the funfair and went on the waltzers and the dodgems. After the funfair we went to the pub for dinner.

Our first stop was Charles Dickens Birthplace as it is so close to home and cheap to get in. Dom found it interesting witch was good and took the information that they called the sitting room THE PARLOR back to school.

Next came the Natural History museum as it was free. He loved the fact that they had dinosaurs and a bit about the Portsmouth from the Ice age to now. There is a butterfly house there and we only saw a few butterflies as its the end of the season. We will go back in season so we can see lots of them.

Then we walked along the beach to southsea Castle. It cost £3.50 for me but free for Dom. There were lots of cannons and of course they had to be climbed on. One bit did scare the hell out of him and that was the time tunnel. This was a kind of play telling the history of the castle using a recording, dummys and lots of flashing lights.
We also went down in the tunnels but they didn't take us too far. I want to go back and do the ghost walks but kids have to be 12 so we'll have to wait a while for that.











We then didn't know what to do so we carried on walking along the sea front to the pier where the fun fair is. so we got some tokens went on a couple of rides. Dom wasn't too sure about the Waltzers as it went faster than it had the last time he went on it. As we didn't have enough tokens to have a dodgem each i let him drive and hes so funny doing it. I also have a bruise on my leg from his driving.

So it came time for dinner and we went to Weatherspoons as its cheap. Dom had sausage, mash and beans and i had a curry. For pudding we had Mint Chocolate Bombes and they were lovely. I also had a Raspberry Sambuca Spritzer that was like aniseed and candy floss.






We had a good day and i think we'll do it again now i know it doesn't have to cost a fortune to have a good day out with my son.

Just a quicky

I just want to ge these up here quickly for a change.
Today was my crop and my class was to make a little house. I saw this idea on the Stampington & Company website. Its such a lovely little house so why not have a go yourself.

and the winner is

Picked out of the hat (well tin) the winner is

SUE

I had tried fancy ways of posting this but none of them worked.
Congrats and it will be winging its way to you soon